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"The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage."
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"The whole theory of the universe is directed unerringly to one single individual."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The problem is that replacement of Quantum Mechanics by Quantum Field Theory is still very demanding."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Never worry about theory as long as the machinery does what it's supposed to do."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If the Confederacy fails, there should be written on its tombstone: Died of a Theory."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm not sure what theory is, unless it's the pursuit of fundamental questions."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Although I know a lot of the previous shuttle flights, in theory, had their tasks laid out; but there were still some changes that came along for them."
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Personal Development
"I don't like writing essays or theory."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Every great batter works on the theory that the pitcher is more afraid of him than he is of the pitcher."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The theory of founder effects does not explain how novel features like plumage traits arise."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A unified theory would put us at the doorstep of a vast universe of things that we could finally explore with precision."
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"You've got the brain-washed, that's the Democrats, and the brain-dead, that's the Republicans!"
Democracy
"The thing that you're faulted on today is not that you are too tough, or not that you aren't careful. It's that you might have been too soft. People want that red meat now because you have to keep up with the mood and the mood today is harsh. It really is."
People
"The way money goes so fast these days, they should paint racing stripes on it."
Money
"Rush has done some top-notch quality work, and we're very, very pleased with them. We really enjoy working with them. They are on time and on budget, which makes me happy."
Time
"I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny."
Fun
"I'll keep doing it until I die or the audiences die."
Persistence
"People are not in a good mood when any politician's face appears on television."
People
"You know when Jerry Ford gets the best joke, you know you're in trouble."
Trouble
"I believe that Bill Clinton's second term will be good for business... my business!"
Business
"Humor is very very risky, particularly for a candidate, unless he's been in so long that it just doesn't matter, and he's not running for president. But it's just that people are so sensitive and so touchy, and you're just going to upset somebody without ever realizing it."
Humor
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