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"I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?"
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"The best way to get husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it."
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Personal Development
"I'm fairly in tune with what's private with my husband and with me."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My husband does not like me to give interviews because I say too much. No talk, no trouble."
Author Name
Personal Development
"And I find it very easy to memorize the scripts, which are so close to conversations my husband and I have."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm just a husband waltzing in the background."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My husband came up to Hot Rocks to check up on me, why is still unknown to me because if I was to cheat on him it wouldn't be in a neighborhood bar where he knows I am."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Sometimes I have given my husband a manuscript to read that has turned out to have fantastic rave reviews and he'll tell me it is no good. Well, if I didn't know him as well as I know him I would be terribly depressed."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I have only one real hobby - my husband."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you were out of a job and your kid needed diapers and your husband just left you, you would be so confused."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My husband was just OK looking. I was in labor and I said to him, 'What if she's ugly? You're ugly.'"
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Personal Development
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"There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto."
Money
"Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight."
Age
"Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight."
Bed
"We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up."
Children
"Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed."
Time
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Medical
"My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me."
Justice
"A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once."
Mistake
"What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day."
Christmas
"It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core."
Beauty
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