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Rita Rudner

"Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be."

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"Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be."

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Amber Hurdle

"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths."

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"A lot of people got lost in Hollywood while trying to become a star. They lost themselves."

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Amber Hurdle

"First, this isn't about telecommuting, because we still have offices that people will come to regularly when they need to brainstorm together, meet with clients, or do research in the library."

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Amber Hurdle

"People think that child-support enforcement benefits children, but it doesn't."

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Amber Hurdle

"I am not for raising taxes on the American people in a soft economy."

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Amber Hurdle

"The Obama administration has now taken exactly the same position as the Bush administration. I don't see how you can keep people from knowing who visits the White House and adhere to a policy of openness and transparency."

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Amber Hurdle

"I do think you feel a little bit like you are preying on people's lives."

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Amber Hurdle

"Processed pig is white trash meat. Some people call it Spam."

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Amber Hurdle

"The next release of mainline is going to have a lot of the advanced features people want, by the way."

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Amber Hurdle

"People don't want their lives fixed. Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their distractions. Their stories resolved. Their messed cleaned up. Because what would they have left? Just the big scary unknown."

Explore more quotes by Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult."
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Rita Rudner
"When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always."
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Rita Rudner
"My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to."
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Rita Rudner
"Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in."
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Rita Rudner
"We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet."
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Rita Rudner
"I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours."
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Rita Rudner
"I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso."
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Rita Rudner
"Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before."
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Rita Rudner
"My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives."
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Rita Rudner
"Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'"
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