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"Nothing happened. Nothing continued to happen. More Nothing. The Return of Nothing. Son of Nothing. Nothing Rides Again. Nothing and Abbot and Costello meet the Wolfman..."
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"In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd."
Author Name
Personal Development
"He had a bleeding cut on his leg and he smelled like shit.Her nose wrinkled. "Step in something?" she asked innocently. mind was being hit by a cab, then landing on the lap of a naked man. With an erection, Anya. He had an erection."
Author Name
Personal Development
"He was dead. However, his nose throbbed painfully, which he thought odd in the circumstances."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Bursar?"Yes, Archchancellor?"You ain't a member of some secret society or somethin', are you?"Me? No, Archchancellor."Then it'd be a damn good idea to take your underpants off your head."
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Personal Development
"Dangerous as a lightning strike, as lethal as a pair of crisscrossing short swords, William whispered, "You're about to find out how your liver tastes, my friend."I have tasted it already, Zacharel said, his voice its usual monotone. The snowflakes began to fall in earnest, tiny at first, but growing in diameter. An arctic wind blustered around him. "It was a bit salty.How the hell was a guy supposed to respond to that?Apparently William didn't know, either, because he gaped at the angel. Then, "Maybe if you added a little pepper?O-kay. It was official. William had an answer for everything."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It was an awkward moment. We were burning down our host's house, a situation which any guest seeks to avoid."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Perhaps after all she put me in her rectum. A matter of complete indifference to me, I needn't tell you. But is it true love, in the rectum? That's what bothers me sometimes. Have I never known true love, after all?"
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Personal Development
"The cucumber and the tomato are both fruit; the avocado is a nut. To assist with the dietary requirements of vegetarians, on the first Tuesday of the month a chicken is officially a vegetable."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Her latest client is Professor Desmond Curnin, a university professor who teaches library sciences to large groups of students. He's quick to pay on-time, quick to never fall behind. He's a brown-haired man with an unkempt beard and thick-framed hipster glasses. He slides a leather briefcase stuffed with dollar bills into the open window of Geraldine's car. "Your fly's unzipped, Geraldine points out, disgusted. "Who gave you a license to sell hot dogs, buddy?"
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Personal Development
"Sometimes I have believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."
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Personal Development
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"Life - and I don't suppose I'm the first to make this comparison - is a disease: sexually transmitted, and invariably fatal."
Life
"A philosopher once asked, "Are we human because we gaze at the stars, or do we gaze at them because we are human?" Pointless, really..."Do the stars gaze back?" Now, that's a question."
Philosophy
"It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But the half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor."
Family
"Chicago happened slowly, like a migraine. First they were driving through countryside, then, imperceptibly, the occasional town became a low suburban sprawl, and the sprawl became the city."
Environment
"A short story is the ultimate close-up magic trick -- a couple of thousand words to take you around the universe or break your heart."
Art
"I hope that in this year to come, YOU make mistakes. Because if YOU are making mistakes, then YOU are making NEW things, trying NEW things, learning, living, pushing YOURself, changing YOURself, changing YOUR world. YOU're doing things YOU've never done before, n MORE importantly, YOU're doing something."
Growth
"It's harder to pick and choose when you're dead. It's like a photograph, you know. It doesn't matter as much."
Death
"Black as night, sweet as sin."
Emotion
"And I would try and walk far enough away that people would not assume I was with him."
Social
"He couldn't see why people made such a fuss about people eating their silly old fruit anyway, but life would be a lot less fun if they didn't. And there was never an apple, in Adam's opinion, that wasn't worth the trouble you got into for eating it."
Life
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