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Rodney Dangerfield

"My mother had morning sickness after I was born."

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"My mother had morning sickness after I was born."

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Asa Don Brown

"The longest tenured First LOVE and Greatest TEACHER, in-fact life long, is none the other, but Mother."

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Asa Don Brown

"People who lost their mother should be careful about committing crime, because probably no one else is praying to save you."

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Asa Don Brown

"The babe at first feeds upon the mother's bosom, but it is always on her heart."

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Asa Don Brown

"A mother's love is more beautiful than any fresh flower."

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Asa Don Brown

"A mother is the most important blessing of your life."

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Asa Don Brown

"That was his mother. When she wasn't crying over the breakfast cereal, she was laughing about killing herself."

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Asa Don Brown

"I wanted to become a kindergarten teacher like my mother."

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Asa Don Brown

"I'm more of a guy's girl. I like having a beer in a bar, and I don't bicker or sit down and do my nails. But I have two sisters and a mother, and we're Latin, so we gossip."

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Asa Don Brown

"The third lesson and tip actually comes from two of my favorite political philosophers: Mao Tse-tung and Mother Theresa - not often coupled with each other, but the two people I turn to most to basically deliver a simple point which is 'you're going to make choices; you're going to challenge; you're going to say why not; you're going to figure out how to do things that have never been done before."

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Asa Don Brown

"I had to get in touch with the source, I had to go back into my abandonment issues with my mother, I had to go into issues with my father I hadn't even looked at before."

Explore more quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

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Rodney Dangerfield
"Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get."
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