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"Elected office holds more perks than Elvis' nightstand."
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"The White House looked into a plan that would allow illegal immigrants to stay in the United States. The plan called for a million Mexicans to marry a million of our ugliest citizens."
State
"Elected office holds more perks than Elvis' nightstand."
Office
"You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R's only one begins with an R."
Education
"Just put down 9/11... I think, on most things I'm liberal, except on defending ourselves and keeping half the money. Those things I'm kind of conservative on."
Money
"The average American's day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charles's dart board."
American
"The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found truffles in Iraq."
Iraq
"The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country."
Death
"What is guilt? Guilt is the pledge drive constantly hammering in our heads that keeps us from fully enjoying the show. Guilt is the reason they put the articles in Playboy."
Guilt
"A new poll shows that Senator Kerry's support in the South is strongest amongst blacks. Kerry's appeal to Southern blacks is obvious. He is a white man who lives far, far away."
Man
"Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don't they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash. Now they just say it on the Internet."
Internet
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"There are no favorites in my office. I treat them all with the same general inconsideration."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A bureaucrat is a Democrat who holds some office that a Republican wants."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Films must all have the same structure. All of this to guarantee box office bonanza, which of course it never does, but that's another discussion entirely."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, that's the - the removal from office and removal of the Ten Commandments were two different issues."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's all about putting the best team together - not just in the front office but the players on the field."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Know which officials are voted into office and which are appointed, and by whom."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Look at the number of cop shows and lawyer shows and forensics shows... I think there could be room for two quite different examinations of the same political office."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Know the official post office abbreviations for all 50 states without having to consult a list."
Author Name
Personal Development
"There is absolutely no way that I would enter that world. I would never run for office."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You don't leave behind box office scores or how many dollars changed hands."
Author Name
Personal Development
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