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Christopher Moore

"If they'd been dogs, they would have all been in the yard eating grass and trying to yak up whatever was making them feel so lousy. Not a bone gnawed, not a ball chased-all tails went unwagged. Oh, life is a fast cat, a short leash, a flea in that place where you just can't scratch."

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"If they'd been dogs, they would have all been in the yard eating grass and trying to yak up whatever was making them feel so lousy. Not a bone gnawed, not a ball chased-all tails went unwagged. Oh, life is a fast cat, a short leash, a flea in that place where you just can't scratch."

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"I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck."
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"Whistler,' Manet called. 'How's your mother?"
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"But Charlie could imagine, because he was a Beta Male, and imagination was his curse...."
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"Rivera rubbed his temples. 'Satan told you to do it?' he said wearily.'No.''Elvis?''I told you, it's supernatural."
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"She was an alien, really - a sort of eating, pooping, tantrum machine - and he didn't understand anything about her species."
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"You cannot believe what you do not believe, Rumi siad. I am an Untouchable because my karma dictates it."
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"I'm feeling full of tiny princes, bustling to get out into the world and start plotting against one another."
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"Mr. Asher, you can resist who you are for only so long. Finally, you just decide to go with fate."
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"Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him...."
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"Only cops and vampires have to have an invitation to enter."
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