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"Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected."

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"Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected."

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"If you want your writing to be taken seriously, don't marry and have kids, and above all, don't die. But if you have to die, commit suicide. They approve of that."

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"My kids are now the most popular kids in their school."

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"I think Little League is wonderful. It keeps the kids out of the house."

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"We still want to idealize moms, and sometimes we want to idealize actresses who are moms, too. I know that's something I've experienced, but we're all just doing the best we can and we're all trying to raise our kids and talk to them about everything that needs to be discussed."

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"Everybody around the world wants to send their kids to our universities. But nobody wants to send their kids here to public school."

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"As kids, we traded 'I like Ike' and 'All the way with Adlai' buttons in elementary school."

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"I always felt I was living in two worlds. One was the Mexican world, because nearly everybody I knew, relatives and cousins and kids in the neighbourhood, were Mexican. Then school was a different world. It was ethnically mixed."

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Asa Don Brown

"But now I have a lot of little kids who watched Invader Zim whenever they could find it on television."

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"The Twilight Zone' wasn't around with the kids. They think going up in space is neat. Within their lifetime, there will be paying passengers on the shuttle."

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"I think kids slowly begin to realize that what they're learning relates to other things they know. Then learning starts to get more and more exciting."

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"There is only one goal. That's to keep working and keep flossing."
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"If I lose show business - I'll really be an orphan!"
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"Then, there was Cary Grant. He spent three hours a week in hospitals teaching nervous people how to eat jello."
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"When people ask me if Dean Martin drank, let me put it this way. If Dracula bit Dean in the neck, he'd get a Bloody Mary."
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"I'll tell you the truth; I wanted to leave me for Sid Caesar."
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"I am always joking and always clowning, giving and helping."
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"Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected."
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