"Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow."

"It is a good thing that life is not as serious as it seems to a waiter."

"Poverty must have many satisfactions, else there would not be so many poor people."

"Don't ever slam a door, you might want to go back."

"Why resist temptation? There will always be more."

"Unhappiness is not knowing what we want and killing ourselves to get it."

"There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have."

"There is more sophistication and less sense in New York than anywhere else on the globe."

"The beggar is the only person in the universe not obliged to study appearance."

"If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I'd have fewer imaginary ones."