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Ryan Stiles

"If I were like your mother, I would be a woman."

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"If I were like your mother, I would be a woman."

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Asa Don Brown

"The longest tenured First LOVE and Greatest TEACHER, in-fact life long, is none the other, but Mother."

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Asa Don Brown

"People who lost their mother should be careful about committing crime, because probably no one else is praying to save you."

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Asa Don Brown

"The babe at first feeds upon the mother's bosom, but it is always on her heart."

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Asa Don Brown

"A mother's love is more beautiful than any fresh flower."

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Asa Don Brown

"A mother is the most important blessing of your life."

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Asa Don Brown

"That was his mother. When she wasn't crying over the breakfast cereal, she was laughing about killing herself."

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Asa Don Brown

"I wanted to become a kindergarten teacher like my mother."

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Asa Don Brown

"I'm more of a guy's girl. I like having a beer in a bar, and I don't bicker or sit down and do my nails. But I have two sisters and a mother, and we're Latin, so we gossip."

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Asa Don Brown

"I have an unending desire to be better and make myself a better person, better mother."

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Asa Don Brown

"The third lesson and tip actually comes from two of my favorite political philosophers: Mao Tse-tung and Mother Theresa - not often coupled with each other, but the two people I turn to most to basically deliver a simple point which is 'you're going to make choices; you're going to challenge; you're going to say why not; you're going to figure out how to do things that have never been done before."

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Ryan Stiles
"The first rule to living in America is 'Stop tap dancing, you fool!'."
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Ryan Stiles
"If I could rap, that would be a sensation, but I can't, you see, I'm just a Caucasian."
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Ryan Stiles
"If I were as much of a man as my woman, I'd be my wife."
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Ryan Stiles
"I look like Walt Disney just threw up."
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"I'd rather drive the yellow brick road, you wouldn't happen to know of a rental car place around."
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Ryan Stiles
"The sky, the sky beyond the door is blue."
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Ryan Stiles
"If I were like your mother, I would be a woman."
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Ryan Stiles
"What do I do when we're not taping? Sit in a dark room and refine my plans for someday ruling Earth from a blimp. And chess."
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Ryan Stiles
"You know, I've got a confession to make myself. I'm not really a priest, I've just got my shirt on backwards."
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Ryan Stiles
"Never trust sheep."
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