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Benjamin Alire Saenz

"Grief was a terrible and beautiful thing."

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"Grief was a terrible and beautiful thing."

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Amber Hurdle

"Oft have I heard that grief softens the mind, And makes it fearful and degenerate; Think therefore on revenge and cease to weep."

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Amber Hurdle

"Grief is not as heavy as guilt, but it takes more away from you."

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Amber Hurdle

"My grief lies all within, and these external manner of laments are merely shadows of the unseen grief that swells with silence in the tortur'd soul."

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Amber Hurdle

"I didn't mean to scare you. I'm not suicidal if that's what's freaking you out. I'm not fucked up in the head. I'm not deranged. I'm not suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder. I'm just a brother who loved his sister more than life itself, so I get a little intense when I think about her."

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Amber Hurdle

"Closer, it's all right. Touch the man of grief.Do. Don't be afraid. My troubles are mine and I am the only man alive who can sustain them."

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Amber Hurdle

"There is no grief like the grief that does not speak."

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Amber Hurdle

"Grief does not change you. It reveals you."

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Amber Hurdle

"I felt the unfairness of it, the inarguable injustice of loving someone who might have loved you back but can't due to deadness."

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Amber Hurdle

"The inletour friend looks as he didwhen we first knew him,and until I wake I believeI will die of grief, for I knowthat this boy grew into a manwho was a faithful friendwho died."

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Amber Hurdle

"O my son Absalom,' Bean said softly, knowing for the first time the kind of anguish that could tear such words from a man's mouth. 'my son, my son Absalom. Would God I could die for thee, O Absalom, my son. My sons!"

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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"Summer was a book of hope. That's why I loved and hated summers. Because they made me want to believe."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"I wanted to buy a T-shirt that read: I AM UNKNOWABLE."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"I wondered what it would be like, to love a girl, to know how a girl thinks, to see the world through a girl's eyes. Maybe they knew more than boys. Maybe they understood things that boys could never understand."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"I thought masturbating was embarassing. I didn't even know why. It just was. It was like having sex with yourself. Having sex with yourself was really weird. Autoeroticism."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"I thought of what my mom had said. 'You talk like a man.' It was easier to talk like a man than to be one."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"Maybe all that silence about my brother did something to me. I think it did. Not talking can make a guy pretty lonely."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"Rafael?Yeah?Do we all have monsters?Yes.Why does God give us so many monsters?You want to know my theory?Sure.I think it's other people who give us monsters. Maybe God doesn't have anything to do with it."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"One of my roommates, Rafael, he's an expert on monsters. Not that he talks about them. I can just tell. People who have monsters recognize each other. They know each other without even saying a word."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"When I walked into the house, I went in search of one of my dad's bottles. Not that they were that hard to find. He hid bottles all over the house. I knew where they all were. That was one of my hobbies, finding where my dad hid his bottles. It was my version of looking for Easter eggs. In my house, Easter lasted forever."
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Benjamin Alire Saenz
"I'd rather have a cup of coffee and a cigarette than live in all that honesty."
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