"If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: Pour a little Lavoris in the toilet."

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"If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: Pour a little Lavoris in the toilet."

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"The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin."

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"Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers."

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"You know what they should call this war - Son of Bush vs. Son of a Bitch."

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