"If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter."

Talk, Winter

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"If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter."

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"I had slumps that lasted into the winter."

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"When I came up to bat with three men on and two outs in the ninth, I looked in the other team's dugout and they were already in street clothes."

Man

"Let's face it. Umpiring is not an easy or happy way to make a living. In the abuse they suffer, and the pay they get for it, you see an imbalance that can only be explained by their need to stay close to a game they can't resist."

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"Sure, women sportswriters look when they're in the clubhouse. Read their stories. How else do you explain a capital letter in the middle of a word?"

Woman

"I didn't get a lot of awards as a player. But they did have a Bob Uecker Day Off for me once in Philly."

Entertainment

"When I looked at the third base coach, he turned his back on me."

Coach

"I set records that will never be equaled. In fact, I hope 90% of them don't even get printed."

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"Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. But to be able to trick people year in and year out the way I did, I think that was a much greater feat."

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"If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter."

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