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"The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks."
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"The resolution to avoid an evil is seldom framed till the evil is so far advanced as to make avoidance impossible."

"The new always carries with it the sense of violation, of sacrilege. What is dead is sacred; what is new, that is different, is evil, dangerous, or subversive."

"I inquired what wickedness is, and I didn't find a substance, but a perversity of will twisted away from the highest substance " You oh God " towards inferior things, rejecting its own inner life and swelling with external matter."

"Some people misunderstand evil and believe it will relent, and because their misplaced hope inspires dark hearts to dream darker dreams, they are the fathers and mothers of all wars. Evil does not relent; it must be defeated. And even when defeated, uprooted, and purified by fire, evil leaves behind a seed that will one day germinate and, in blooming, again be misunderstood."
Explore more quotes by Emo Philips

"My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself."

"I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'"

"I love to go to the playground and watch the children jumping up and down. They don't know I'm firing blanks."

"I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper."

"Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist."

"When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, I've tried other enemas."
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