"Humor is imperative, more important than food. You have a choice when someone dies. You can lie down or get back into life. Do something for someone else."

Humor, Food, Life, Lie

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"Humor is imperative, more important than food. You have a choice when someone dies. You can lie down or get back into life. Do something for someone else."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"I've been on so many blind dates I should get a free dog."

Whitney M. Young, American Activist

Humor, Blind

"Sometimes absurd logic can be amusing and heart-touching."

Debasish Mridha, American Author

Humor, Logic, Absurd, Heart, Amusement

"I think at its best the American sense of humor is the same as the British sense of humor at its best, which is to be wry and ironic and self deprecating."

Simon Pegg, British Comedian

Humor, American, Self, Sense

"You can turn your back on a person, but never turn your back on a drug, especially when its waving a razor sharp hunting knife in your eye."

Hunter S. Thompson, American Journalist

Humor, Eye, Hunting

"Alimony: the cash surrender value of a husband."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Alimony, Husband, Money, Law

"Beware of giggle grins, they are highly contagious."

Richelle E. Goodrich, American Poet

Humor, Happiness, Truth, Wisdom

"When I reprimanded my son for hair like Michael Jackson he said: "I don't see the problem you wear yours like Michael Jordan.""

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Hair, Identity, Funny

"God, you had enough time to have been through it three times. You've been through my stuff. I bet you over and let one of you stick the world's longest finger up my ass. If a prostate check is an exam, that was a motherfucking safari. I was scared to look down. I thought I'd see that guy's finger nail sticking out of my cock."

Stephen King, American Author

Humor, Regret, Truth, Wisdom, Power

"There's folks 'ud stand on their heads and then say the fault was i' their boots."

George Eliot, British Author

Humor, Fault, Responsibility, Blame

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

Humor, Truth, Wisdom, Power

Explore more quotes by Doris Roberts

"Love them for who they are, and what they are they are; they are not you. Good stuff, isn't it? You have to live 73 years to get that."

Love, Years

"You know I'm an actress, not just a funny lady."

Funny, Lady

"You can't show me an ad on TV with hard bodies and say I have to buy that car. You have to tell me why that car is better and safer than another car."

Car,

"There's no magazine you open, unless its AARP, that shows a woman over the age of 45 in any other light, other than having to buy Depends or Viagra."

Age, Light, Open, Woman

"With my talent, I can make people laugh and give them another attitude about life. What a blessing that is for me."

Life, Talent, People, Attitude

"You can change my mind, but you gotta work harder at it."

Change, Work, Mind

"My awards are lovely. I love to show them of."

Love, Awards

"You can call me an older woman - I don't mind that at all - just don't call me an old one, because I'm not."

Mind, Old, Woman

"When I was in kindergarten, I had one line in a little play. I said, I am Patrick Potato and this is my cousin, Mrs. Tomato, and I heard laughter. I wanted to be an actress from that moment on."

Laughter, Play

"If someone is mean, harmful, or evil, they're out of my life. I cross them out."

Life, Evil