"The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter."

Sports, Winter

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"The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter."

Exlpore more Sports quotes

"All the characters and plots were predetermined. Games make bad plots."

Margaret Weis, American Writer

Sports, Games

"The difference between the more traditional sports clubs and Congress is that Congress doesn't really compete against another team."

Cal Thomas, American Journalist

Sports, Congress, Difference

"I was surprised I won the award because I've always been a very aggressive player and I earn my share of fouls on the court. I play rough, and because I'm an older player, of course I use tricks on the younger players."

Sue Wicks, American Athlete

Sports, Court, Play

"I ran my fastest marathon in the rain."

Bill Rodgers, American Athlete

Sports, Marathon, Rain

"You play. You win. You play. You lose. You play."

Jeanette Winterson, British Novelist

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"If I had a personal wish for the new ideas in this new book it would be that every parent, every counselor, every teacher, every professor, every sports coach that deals with young people would understand the three circle concept."

James Collins, American Athlete

Sports, People, Ideas, Coach

"Well, the memories were obviously - every match is important, every point counts, especially the last sort of 18, 20 years when the matches have been so tight."

Bernhard Langer, German Athlete

Sports, Memories, Years

"As long as I play ball, I can get any woman I want."

Dennis Rodman, American Athlete

Sports, Play, Want, Woman

"Pebble Beach. It is tough and the lay out is amazing."

Natalie Gulbis, American Athlete

Sports, Beach

"I have worked hard to improve my consistency in my driving, irons, short game, and putting."

Natalie Gulbis, American Athlete

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Explore more quotes by Dave Barry

"As you get older; you've probably noticed that you tend to forget things. You'll be talking with somebody at a party, and you'll know that you know this person, but no matter how hard you try, you can't remember his or her name. This can be very embarassing, especially if he or she turns out to be your spouse."

Aging

"Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although sometimes you have to hunt around."

Television

"My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible."

Humor

"The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire."

Now

"Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance."

Dance

"Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash."

Driving

"Aside from velcro, time is the most mysterious substance in the universe. You can't see it or touch it, yet a plumber can charge you upwards of seventy-five dollars per hour for it, without necessarily fixing anything."

Humor

"Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."

Car

"We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective."

Society

"The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot."

Computer