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"England is better only because I stand out there as 'unusual'."
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Exlpore more England quotes
"I don't think England is that gray but India is like a long drone."
"While the struggle for religious liberty had proceeded without large-scale bloodshed in New England and elsewhere in the United States, the struggle for political liberty had not fared so well."
"It has always been difficult to get Big Bird to be very pretty. Big Bird in England is much more gorgeous."
"I was born in Middlesex, England, which is really London."
"I don't think the Republicans would appreciate the comparison, but they're exactly like the Labor Party in England in the 1970s. They're letting their extremists take them straight down. The same thing is going to happen - they had to disappear for a while and when they reinvented themselves they did it with moderates, they did it with Tony Blair."
Explore more quotes by Emo Philips
"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."
"I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well.""
"I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run around yelling and screaming. They don't know I'm only using blanks."
"In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn't have any, they gave you some."
"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life."
"My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself."
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