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"My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.'"
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"A friend is someone who will always be there for you, in good and hard times."
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Personal Development
"Don't appreciate me, I'm not up to it. Don't criticize me, I don't deserve it. Just be my friend and forgive me, because I am craving for it."
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Personal Development
"Friendship is a gift forever;Cherish everyday, forget it never"
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Personal Development
"Friendships - and indeed most relationships - are measured in the closeness of hearts, minds and soul ties... not in the distance of physical miles or even the passing of time."
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Personal Development
"Rejoicing in our joy, not suffering over our suffering, makes someone a friend."
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Personal Development
"A good friend loves you when the condition is better, a best friend holds your hand when you're in gutter."
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Personal Development
"What lies before us? Horrible thoughts arise in my heart. If we had died before today we should have been happy."
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Personal Development
"A good friend is someone who can love you like a dog and talk to you like a human."
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Personal Development
"The depth of friendship depends on the depth of our love."
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Personal Development
"Anyone can have a friend, but the one that would walk in a storm to find you is all you will ever need."
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Personal Development
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"I like Kit-Kat, unless I'm with four or more people."
People
"I love blackjack. But I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi circle."
Love
"I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, "You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit."
Business
"My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them."
Plants
"I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too."
Drugs
"Bologna is a deli meat for people with eyes."
People
"It's very dangerous to wave to people you don't know because what if they don't have hands? They'll think you're cocky."
People
"Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!"
Children
"I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle."
Water
"I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality."
Work
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