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Oscar Wilde

"My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go."

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"My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go."

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Donna Grant

"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."

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Donna Grant

"Unless you stop him. Perhaps next we meet.""You'll be just as annoying?" I guessed.He fixed my with those warm brown eyes. "Or perhaps you could bring me up to speed on those modern courtship rituals."I sat there stunned until he gave me a glimpse of a smile-just enough to let me know he was teasing. Then he disappeared."Oh, very funny!" I yelled."

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Donna Grant

"Laughter is carbonated holiness."

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Donna Grant

"Well, I said, "you obviously have some power. You chased off those hooligans with rotten fruit. Perhaps you have banana-kinesis? Or you can control garbage? I once knew a Roman goddess, Cloacina, who presided over the city's sewer system. Perhaps you're related? Meg pouted. I got the impression I might have said something wrong, though I couldn't imagine what."

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Donna Grant

"Alas poor Yorick! I knew him Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest of most excellent fancy."

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Donna Grant

"The Fool held his breath. On long nights on the hard flagstones he had dreamed of women like her. Although, if he really thought about it, not much like her; they were better endowed around the chest, their noses weren't so red and pointed, and their hair tended to flow more. But the Fool's libido was bright enough to tell the difference between the impossible and the conceivably attainable, and hurriedly cut in some filter circuits."

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Donna Grant

"D'yer see it? This finger, laddie, could send ye to meet yer Maker!Sgt. Deisenburger stared at the black and purple nail a few inches from his face. As an offensive weapon it rated quite highly, especially if it was ever used in the preparation of food."

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Donna Grant

"Showing off is more ridiculous in instances where the thing that is being shown off was bought on credit."

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Donna Grant

"I didn't understand how. But the toilets had responded to me. I had become one with the plumbing..."

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Donna Grant

"It is dull, Son of Adam, to drink without eating," said the Queen presently. "What would you like best to eat?""Turkish Delight, please, your Majesty," said Edmund."

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Oscar Wilde
"There is no necessity to separate the monarch from the mob; all authority is equally bad."

Authority

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Oscar Wilde
"Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other."

Love

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Oscar Wilde
"Journalism justifies its own existence by the great Darwinian principle of the survival of the vulgarist."

Society

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Oscar Wilde
"Moral grounds are always the last refuge of people who have no sense of beauty."

Morality

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Oscar Wilde
"Nay, without thought or conscious desire, might not things external to ourselves vibrate in unison with our moods and passions, atom calling to atom in secret love or strange affinity?"

Philosophy

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Oscar Wilde
"In England, an inventor is regarded almost as a crazy man, and in too many instances, invention ends in disappointment and poverty. In America, an inventor is honoured, help is forthcoming, and the exercise of ingenuity, the application of science to the work of man, is there the shortest road to wealth."

Society

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Oscar Wilde
"There were poisons so subtle that to know their properties one had to sicken of them. There were maladies so strange that one had to pass through them if one sought to understand their nature."

Knowledge

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Oscar Wilde
"Beauty is the only thing that time cannot harm. Philosophies fall away like sand, creeds follow one another, but what is beautiful is a joy for all seasons, a possession for all eternity."

Beauty

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Oscar Wilde
"I never approve, or disapprove, of anything now. It is an absurd attitude to take towards life."

Philosophy

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Oscar Wilde
"The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily. That is what fiction means."

Fiction

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