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"There's nothing more difficult to do than comedy."
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"Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke."
"Uh-oh, I hope he doesn't start rattling off dirty limericks next; she'll probably burn the hotel down."
"Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee."Who's Bruce Lee?"Who's Bruce Lee? Kenji asks, horrified. "Oh my God. We can't even be friends anymore."Why? Was he a friend of yours?"You know what, he says, "just stop. Just-I can't even talk to you right now."
"I had to stop myself from laughing. Who needs help taking a pill?"
"Stand-up comedy and poverty. Those were my two main endeavors."
"Sometimes Spiro missed the times when a troublesome worker was thrown out of a high window and that was the end of him. These days, if you threw someone out of a window, they'd phone their lawyer on the way down."
Explore more quotes by Robert Evans
"I learned at a very early age, the easiest thing in the world is to tell the truth, and then you don't have to remember what you said. It has nothing to do with morality, just remembering what you said."
"When a parent shows up with an attitude of entitlement, understand that under it is a boatload of anxiety."
"Buildings designed with careful attention to aesthetics arouse and enlighten their occupants and that promotes their good health."
"In every place there are 100 people who can say no and only one person who can say yes. You have to get a good piece of material to the right person."
"I never graduated high school; they had to change the Ivy League rules. During my tenure at Brown, I helped them become the number one Ivy League school."
"Buildings designed exclusively on scientific principles will depress their occupants and constrain their creativity."
"I get a lot from all young people. I make movies for young people. If I made pictures for people my age, no one would see them. I hang with young people all the time."
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