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Erma Bombeck

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."

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"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."

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Donna Grant

"Religions do a useful thing: they narrow God to the limits of man. Philosophy replies by doing a necessary thing: it elevates man to the plane of God."

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Donna Grant

"I know nothing of God or the Devil. I have never seen a vision nor learned a secret that would damn or save my soul."

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Donna Grant

"There's too much tendency to attribute to God the evils that man does of his own free will."

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Donna Grant

"I gave in, and admitted that God was God."

God,
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Donna Grant

"God, our genes, our environment, or some stupid programmer keying in code at an ancient terminal - there's no way free will can ever exist if we as individuals are the result of some external cause."

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Donna Grant

"What I did was take the Jesus of the Gospels, the Son of God, the Son of the Virgin Mary, and sought to make Him utterly believable, a vital breathing character."

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Donna Grant

"There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, "All right, then, have it your way.""

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Donna Grant

"Our passionate preoccupation with the sky, the stars, and a God somewhere in outer space is a homing impulse. We are drawn back to where we came from."

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Donna Grant

"Without the Mind, there is no God. Without you, there is no God."

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Donna Grant

"I read the book of Job last night, I don't think God comes out well in it."

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Erma Bombeck
"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."
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Erma Bombeck
"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest."
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Erma Bombeck
"A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat."
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Erma Bombeck
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."
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Erma Bombeck
"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."
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Erma Bombeck
"Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth."
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Erma Bombeck
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."
Car,
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Erma Bombeck
"Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated."
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Erma Bombeck
"My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?"
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Erma Bombeck
"I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: "Checkout Time is 18 years.""
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