"Better to sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunken Christian."

Humor, Christian, Sleep

63

Create Your Own Wallpaper

Standard

Customized

"Better to sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunken Christian."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Don't panic. Are you sitting? You probably don't need to sit. Well, possibly. At least lean on something."

Maggie Stiefvater, American Author

Humor, Calm, Reassurance, Fear

"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."

John Green, American Author

Humor, Police, Interaction, Social

"WHAT FOR IS THIS BOX PADDED? IS IT TO BE SAT ON? CAN IT BE THAT IT IS CAT-FLAVOURED?"

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Death, Confusion, Box

" Think of how many times you put on your underwear in a lifetime. It was appalling, it was disgusting, it was stupid."

Charles Bukowski, American Author

Humor, Life, Daily, Routine

"Silverfish looked down."Oh. Are you a dwarf?"Cuddy gave him a blank stare."Are you a giant?" He said."Me? Of course not!"Ah. Then I must be a dwarf, yes."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Identity, Giants, Truth

"What's a philosopher?' said Brutha.Someone who's bright enough to find a job with no heavy lifting,' said a voice in his head."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Truth, Happiness, Power, Today

"At this, Gansey rolled over onto his back and folded his hands on his chest. He wore a salmon polo shirt, which, in Blue's opinion, was far more hellish than anything they'd discussed to this point."

Maggie Stiefvater, American Author

Humor, Appearance, Opinion, Judgment

"Reason like a sphere? What type of reasoning does a wooden sphere do?""The circular type, I should think. And, by coincidence, it is my favorite type as well. Perhaps that's why I'm so good at the game."

Brandon Sanderson, American Author

Humor, Logic, Reason, Games

"Lovemaking is a big grammatical error, i think it should be, LustMaking."

Michael Bassey Johnson, Nigerian Philosopher

Humor, Love, Lust, Language, Truth

"If there was an elephant in the supermarket, she'd either not see it at all, or call it Mrs Jones and talk about fishcakes."

Jeanette Winterson, British Novelist

Humor, Perception, Reality, Imagination

Explore more quotes by Herman Melville

"A man thinks that by mouthing hard words he understands hard things."

Wisdom

"There is a touch of divinity even in brutes, and a special halo about a horse, that should forever exempt him from indignities."

Nature

"At sea a fellow comes out. Salt water is like wine, in that respect."

Nature

"I love to sail forbidden seas, and land on barbarous coasts."

Exploration

"Ahab is for ever Ahab, man. This whole act's immutably decreed. 'Twas rehearsed by thee and me a billion years before this ocean rolled. Fool! I am the Fates' lieutenant, I act under orders."

Philosophy

"A smile is the chosen vehicle of all ambiguities."

Humor

"So far gone am I in the dark side of earth, that its other side, the theoretic bright one, seems but uncertain twilight to me."

Philosophy

"Let America first praise mediocrity even, in her children, before she praises... the best excellence in the children of any other land."

Patriotism

"There are times when even the most potent governor must wink at transgression, in order to preserve the laws inviolate for the future."

Leadership

"To know how to grow old is the master work of wisdom, and one of the most difficult chapters in the great art of living."

Wisdom