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"A conservative is a liberal who got mugged the night before."
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"But I came from a conservative Republican background."
"Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others."
"The healthy stomach is nothing if it is not conservative. Few radicals have good digestions."
"A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now."
"I'm a very straight-laced, conservative news kind of guy."
"It's my view that any conservative who loves his country has to be extremely concerned."
"A liberal is a person who believes that water can be made to run uphill. A conservative is someone who believes everybody should pay for his water. I'm somewhere in between: I believe water should be free, but that water flows downhill."
"The average man, if he meddles with criticism at all, is a conservative critic."
"A conservative is one who admires radicals centuries after they're dead."
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