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"If the government decides to put your life under a microscope, do you think it won't find something? I suspect there's not an adult in the country who would walk away totally unscathed if every aspect of his or her life were investigated the way Stewart's ImClone trading was."
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"Democracy means government by the uneducated, while aristocracy means government by the badly educated."
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Personal Development
"Who is an elected government in a constitutional democracy to decide it will not tolerate dissent."
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Personal Development
"We all know what Parliament is, and we are all ashamed of it."
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Personal Development
"If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep."
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Personal Development
"Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good."
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Personal Development
"I can make a firm pledge, under my plan, no family making less than $250,000 a year will see any form of tax increase. Not your income tax, not your payroll tax, not your capital gains taxes, not any of your taxes."
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Personal Development
"The worst government is often the most moral. One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane. But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression."
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Personal Development
"There shall be no end to the government of God."
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Personal Development
"There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you."
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Personal Development
"Which government is the best? The one that teaches us to govern ourselves."
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"It's easy to write a good column if you've got good information. It's hard if you have to depend on style alone. I suppose there are people who can get away with styling on a regular basis. I'm not one of them. You're probably not, either."
People
"If the government decides to put your life under a microscope, do you think it won't find something? I suspect there's not an adult in the country who would walk away totally unscathed if every aspect of his or her life were investigated the way Stewart's ImClone trading was."
Government
"I wanted to be a columnist so badly that I took a huge pay cut to leave Forbes, which wouldn't give me a column, and join Newsday, which wanted my column for its Sunday business section."
Business
"People are treating the Stewart case as seriously as Enron when it's really over trivia."
People
"Report, report, report. Dig, dig, dig. Think, think, think. Don't stop being a reporter because you've become a columnist."
Being
"Go for the gold: better one great column and some undistinguished ones than constant mediocrity."
Mediocrity
"Teamwork is better than isolation, especially for a columnist."
Teamwork
"The column's worked out great for me. I've gotten a ton of ego satisfaction, had a lot of fun, won a batch of prizes and occasionally done some public good."
Ego
"The lesson that any thinking person draws from the Stewart saga is that when the government asks questions, run for your lawyer and don't say a word. Had Stewart kept her mouth shut, she'd be OK."
Government
"Don't commit to being a columnist unless you're willing to do it right. Report your behind off, so you have something original and useful to say. Say it in a way that will interest someone other than you, your family and your sources."
Family
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