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Malcolm Muggeridge

"Good taste and humor are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore."

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"Good taste and humor are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore."

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A.E. Samaan

"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"

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A.E. Samaan

"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."

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A.E. Samaan

"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."

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A.E. Samaan

"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"

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A.E. Samaan

"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."

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A.E. Samaan

"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."

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A.E. Samaan

"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."

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A.E. Samaan

"Comedy strikes here... just to reduce pressure and depression."

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A.E. Samaan

"They're both bungholes who think they're too noble to shit."

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A.E. Samaan

"She breathed an enormous sigh, looked at Poirot, Looked away, and suddenly blurted out, "You're too old. Nobody told me you were so old. I really don't want to be rude but - there it is. You're too old. I'm really sorry." She turned abruptly and blundered out of the room, rather like a desperate moth in lamplight. Poirot, his mouth open, heard the bang of the front door. He ejaculated: "Non d'un nom d'un nom..."

Explore more quotes by Malcolm Muggeridge

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Malcolm Muggeridge
"Travel, of course, narrows the mind."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"Every happening, great and small, is a parable whereby God speaks to us, and the art of life is to get the message."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"There is no such thing as darkness; only a failure to see."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"My opinion, my conviction, gains immensely in strength and sureness the minute a second mind as adopted it."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"He was not only a bore; he bored for England."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"Bad humor is an evasion of reality; good humor is an acceptance of it."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"The pursuit of happiness, which American citizens are obliged to undertake, tends to involve them in trying to perpetuate the moods, tastes and aptitudes of youth."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"Sex is the ersatz or substitute religion of the 20th Century."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"St. Teresa of Avila described our life in this world as like a night at a second-class hotel."
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Malcolm Muggeridge
"History will see advertising as one of the real evil things of our time. It is stimulating people constantly to want things, want this, want that."
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