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"Find a priest who understands English and doesn't look like Rasputin."
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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
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Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
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Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
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Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
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Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
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Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
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Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
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Personal Development
"She breathed an enormous sigh, looked at Poirot, Looked away, and suddenly blurted out, "You're too old. Nobody told me you were so old. I really don't want to be rude but - there it is. You're too old. I'm really sorry." She turned abruptly and blundered out of the room, rather like a desperate moth in lamplight. Poirot, his mouth open, heard the bang of the front door. He ejaculated: "Non d'un nom d'un nom..."
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Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
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Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
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"Find a priest who understands English and doesn't look like Rasputin."
Humor
"We must free ourselves of the hope that the sea will ever rest. We must learn to sail in high winds."
Progress
"After a certain point, money is meaningless. It ceases to be the goal. The game is what counts."
Success
"To succeed in business it is necessary to make others see things as you see them."
Leadership
"The secret of business is to know something that nobody else knows."
Wisdom
"It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light."
Motivational
"If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning."
Humor
"I have no friends and no enemies - only competitors."
Friendship
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