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"Earnestness is stupidity sent to college."
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"I enjoyed high school and college, and I think I learned a lot, but that was not really my focus. My focus was on trying to figure out what businesses to start."

"The result was, when Congress convened in January 1971, everyone was now an environmentalist. They had seen a new force, college students, who favored the environment."

"Seriousness is stupidity sent to college."

"Do you realize that if we could increase just by 50 percent the number of adults who have a college degree, it would add $5 billion to the economy and it would result in a net income to the state of Arkansas of $340 million a year?"

"It's clear enough that there was substantial fraud in Ohio, thus delivering the Electoral College vote for President Bush."

"Going to college helped me, because I had four years in the conservatory program, which is close as you can get to a professional environment. It's like all day."

"You know, I come from six generations of college graduates."
Explore more quotes by P. J. O'Rourke

"Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue."

"Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them on us."

"America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased."

"Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power."

"Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce."

"You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going."

"Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy."
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