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"You know when Jerry Ford gets the best joke, you know you're in trouble."
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"The trouble with wedlock is that there's not enough wed and too much lock."
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Personal Development
"Light troubles speak; the weighty are struck dumb."
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Personal Development
"Let what is irksome become habitual, no more will it trouble you."
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Personal Development
"When you have a good script you're almost in more trouble than when you have a terrible script."
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Personal Development
"When trouble ends even troubles please."
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Personal Development
"I have trouble with seafood because it tastes like a dock."
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Personal Development
"It's amazing how much trouble you can get in when you don't have anything else to do."
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Personal Development
"The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a programmer is doing until it's too late."
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Personal Development
"I think I'm going to have a lot of trouble."
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Personal Development
"Nobody can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it."
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"You've got the brain-washed, that's the Democrats, and the brain-dead, that's the Republicans!"
Democracy
"Believe me when I say that Bill Clinton's second term will be good for business. My business."
Business
"Humor is very very risky, particularly for a candidate, unless he's been in so long that it just doesn't matter, and he's not running for president. But it's just that people are so sensitive and so touchy, and you're just going to upset somebody without ever realizing it."
Humor
"The thing that you're faulted on today is not that you are too tough, or not that you aren't careful. It's that you might have been too soft. People want that red meat now because you have to keep up with the mood and the mood today is harsh. It really is."
People
"Rush has done some top-notch quality work, and we're very, very pleased with them. We really enjoy working with them. They are on time and on budget, which makes me happy."
Time
"People are not in a good mood when any politician's face appears on television."
People
"I can't think of a performer who is better on television than in person."
Television
"You know when Jerry Ford gets the best joke, you know you're in trouble."
Trouble
"We're just moving along as quick as possible."
Progress
"I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny."
Fun
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