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"I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him "father.""
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"Mix one part Denzel Washington and two parts Eva Mendes and you have a nice hot cocktail."

"I was born in Washington, D.C., and I was raised in Milwaukee."

"If I decide to tour, I definitely would come to Washington, D.C. We'll see."

"Voters definitely believe Washington is corrupt - but most think it's bipartisan."

"Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?"

"Only in Washington does a decrease in the proposed increase equal a spending cut."

"The most difficult owner for me was the late George Marshall of Washington."

"Like they said about The West Wing, you can't do a show about Washington until you can."

"There's a Washington standard of casually putting things off the record. It's really gone too far. I don't know an easy way to turn it back."
Explore more quotes by Will Rogers


"The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal they have to live off each other, while the Republicans, why, they live off the Democrats."


"Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it."


"We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by."


"Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven't had one since Taft. Look at the United States, they have not had one since Lincoln."


"If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you sell cheaper than him, that's mass production."
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