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"The gods too are fond of a joke."
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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
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Personal Development

"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
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Personal Development

"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
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Personal Development

"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
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Personal Development

"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
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Personal Development

"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
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Personal Development

"Unless you stop him. Perhaps next we meet.""You'll be just as annoying?" I guessed.He fixed my with those warm brown eyes. "Or perhaps you could bring me up to speed on those modern courtship rituals."I sat there stunned until he gave me a glimpse of a smile-just enough to let me know he was teasing. Then he disappeared."Oh, very funny!" I yelled."
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Personal Development

"Papa, potatoes, poultry, prunes and prism, are all very good words for the lips."
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Personal Development

"Laughter is carbonated holiness."
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Personal Development

"Well, I said, "you obviously have some power. You chased off those hooligans with rotten fruit. Perhaps you have banana-kinesis? Or you can control garbage? I once knew a Roman goddess, Cloacina, who presided over the city's sewer system. Perhaps you're related? Meg pouted. I got the impression I might have said something wrong, though I couldn't imagine what."
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"The one exclusive sign of thorough knowledge is the power of teaching."
Education

"All men seek one goal: success or happiness."
Ambition

"All terrible things are more terrible if they give us no chance of retrieving a blunder-either no chance at all, or only one that depends on our enemies and not ourselves. Those things are also worse which we cannot, or cannot easily, help. Speaking generally, anything causes us to feel fear that when it happens to, or threatens, others causes us to feel pity."
Emotion

"The gods too are fond of a joke."
Humor

"A tragedy is a representation of an action that is whole and complete and of a certain magnitude. A whole is what has a beginning and middle and end."
Philosophy

"To attain any assured knowledge about the soul is one of the most difficult things in the world."
Philosophy

"The virtue of justice consists in moderation, as regulated by wisdom."
Wisdom

"It is a part of probability that many improbabilities will happen."
Reality

"Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods."
Friendship

"Personal beauty is a greater recommendation than any letter of reference."
Woman
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