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"I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford."
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"Never give up your wife, husband, children and families. Believe that people can change. Give others opportunity to change."
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Personal Development
"It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But the half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor."
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Personal Development
"Blessed is the womb that born you."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Until now, you have always lived your life alone. Every decision you've made has been for you and you alone. Now, and for the rest of your days, your life will be tied to another's. Every decision you make will be for both of you. What one does affects the other. You are a family, a team inseparable and unbreakable."
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Personal Development
"Father, I know you will hear me, I will speak."
Author Name
Personal Development
"When we sat down on the couch again, you curled up against my side, like you used to when you were a tod."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Children are angels."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was sixteen and my mother was about to throw me out of the house forever, for breaking a very big rule, even bigger than the forbidden books. The rule was not just No Sex, but definitely No Sex With Your Own Sex."
Author Name
Personal Development
"God bless me and my son John Me and my wife him and his wife Us four and no more."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We come into the world through a man and a woman. But life blessings us with many fathers and mothers."
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Personal Development
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"Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting."
Humor
"American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it."
Humor
"As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula."
Humor
"The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes."
Religion
"If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland."
Humor
"The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot."
Computer
"Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column."
Chance
"The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting."
History
"Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."
Car
"I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems."
Car
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