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"The bat is gone, but the smile remains."
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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
Author Name
Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"I went to the kitchen and felt-up the turkey."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"If a reporter doesn't like the person he's writing about, it shows up in his article."
Writing
"I see a lot of people who love their jobs. I see some garbage collectors smiling as they go about their work."
Love
"I'm proud of the fact that I'm the only player to hit a ball completely out of Dodger Stadium."
Fact
"I owe a large part of my success to Joe Brown, who helped me both as a player and a person."
Success
"I eventually became proud of my strikeouts, because each one represented another learning experience."
Experience
"That's where the future lies, in the youth of today."
Future
"I'm a God-fearing man who worships with my heart and with my life."
Life
"Human beings are pampered by the Lord. Their real tests don't come until later in life."
Life
"Vietnam helped me realize who the true heroes really are in this world. It's not the home-run hitters."
Home
"I wasn't out drinking and abusing my body. I simply loved to go out and dance."
Dance
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