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"When I'm out with my girlfriends at the bar, and I see some young 18-year old boy, just for fun I say, 'Hi honey. Do you like girls? Do you like girls exclusively? Oh, good.'"
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"Whatever is funny is subversive, every joke is ultimately a custard pie... a dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion."
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Personal Development
"Fun is never gone because life is fun."
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Personal Development
"Great, big, serious novels always get awards. If it's a battle between a great, big, serious novel and a funny novel, the funny novel is doomed."
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Personal Development
"I'm one of those writers who tends to be really good at making outlines and sticking to them. I'm very good at doing that, but I don't like it. It sort of takes a lot of the fun out."
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Personal Development
"Girls are so queer you never know what they mean. They say No when they mean Yes, and drive a man out of his wits for the fun of it."
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Personal Development
"Working is hard and distracts from having fun."
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Personal Development
"Plus, I love comic writing. Nothing satisfies me more than finding a funny way to phrase something."
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Personal Development
"Kids cannot follow stories. They don't know what the hell is going on in a cartoon. They like to see funny visual things happening."
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Personal Development
"I know what Germans are. They are a funny people. They are always choosing someone to lead them in a direction which they do not want to go."
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Personal Development
"Whitney and I have fun reading the newspaper sometimes. You'd be amazed at the places they say I've been."
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"This is my ultimate fantasy: watching QVC with a credit card while making love and eating at the same time."
Love
"I love a man who can wear my underwear."
Love
"Does being a feminist mean that I believe that I'm as good as any man? Yes."
Being
"Whenever women catfight, men think it's going to turn to sex."
Men
"When I'm out with my girlfriends at the bar, and I see some young 18-year old boy, just for fun I say, 'Hi honey. Do you like girls? Do you like girls exclusively? Oh, good.'"
Fun
"I don't think men like a bad girl. Well, I haven't had a date in a year so I'm obviously doing something wrong. It's not that my standards are too high, I haven't even been asked out in a year. I have no standards, anyone, please!"
Men
"I wouldn't hunt a person down for food. But if he were already dead."
Food
"No one's ever happy with their position in Hollywood. You hear that from people you'd never dream would complain."
People
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