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"If you watch the news and don't like it, then this is your counter program to the news."
News,
Standard
Customized
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"Television's very dependent on images. That's not what news is."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Online, you have things like Slate Magazine, which has a lot of commentary and analysis of stories, so it gives you a fuller picture. I would compare that to a news magazine or the New Republic."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The bad news motivated the drill instructors that much more."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You don't tell us how to stage the news and we don't tell you how to cover it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Local television and local TV news isn't telling the voters about local candidates."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I read the newspaper avidly. It is my one form of continuous fiction."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The good news is, we're not bankrupt. The bad news is, we're close."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's gonna be short if it's news; put it at the top. Style's not an issue, just make it news."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Of, course it always cheers a news editor when a story has what we describe as 'legs' therefore it, erm, runs."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We have a product for sale called news, and I'm a salesman."
Author Name
Personal Development
More
"Many of our soldiers are stationed at Camp Coyote just south of the Iraqi border. This is how you know we have a strong army, when you can actually tell your enemy exactly where your camp is and what its name is."
Army
"We have it. The smoking gun. The evidence. The potential weapon of mass destruction we have been looking for as our pretext of invading Iraq. There's just one problem - it's in North Korea."
Destruction
"Ahh, Earth Day, the only day of the year where being able to hacky-sack will get you laid."
Being
"I can be in 20 movies. But I'll never be an actor."
Movies
"You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried everything. Yes, I want to look back and know that I was terrible at a variety of things."
Work
"I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land."
Land
"I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over."
Amusement
"Insomnia is my greatest inspiration."
Inspirational
"I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days."
Impression
"Yesterday, the president met with a group he calls the coalition of the willing. Or, as the rest of the world calls them, Britain and Spain."
President
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