"It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean."

Funny,

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"It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean."

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"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it."

W. Somerset Maugham, British Playwright

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"The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...'"

Isaac Asimov, American Scientist

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"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."

George Bernard Shaw, Irish Dramatist

Funny, Life, People

"Stealing, you'll go far in life. Actually, there is something funny about getting away with it."

Mike Judge, American Producer

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"My little dog, he did not get ill. It is so funny that people get ill on a boat and dogs do not."

Anna Held, Polish Entertainer

Funny, People, Dogs

"I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it's fantastic and it makes me very happy. I'm dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet."

Bob Saget, American Actor

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"I remember nearly having a fit of the giggles during the reading because dear Daniel was SO respectful and serious and I was finding the whole situation funny because I was speaking to his profile."

Madeleine Stowe, American Actress

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"It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up."

Dan Castellaneta, American Actor

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"Movies either work or they don't work and they're either funny or they're not and we work very hard. To achieve that kind of work is really kind of delicate stitching."

Ivan Reitman, Canadian Actor

Funny, Movies, Work

"One time I went into a restroom and a girl followed me in. I signed an autograph for her in the sink. It was pretty funny because she was in a guy's restroom and she wasn't embarrassed at all."

Zac Efron, American Actor

Funny, Time, Pretty

Explore more quotes by Mae West

"I like a man who's good, but not too good - for the good die young, and I hate a dead one."

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"Any time you got nothing to do - and lots of time to do it - come on up."

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"Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you."

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"If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning."

Coffee

"I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing."

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"I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action."

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Exlpore more Funny quotes

"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it."

"The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...'"

"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."

"Stealing, you'll go far in life. Actually, there is something funny about getting away with it."

"My little dog, he did not get ill. It is so funny that people get ill on a boat and dogs do not."

"I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it's fantastic and it makes me very happy. I'm dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet."

"I remember nearly having a fit of the giggles during the reading because dear Daniel was SO respectful and serious and I was finding the whole situation funny because I was speaking to his profile."

"It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up."

"Movies either work or they don't work and they're either funny or they're not and we work very hard. To achieve that kind of work is really kind of delicate stitching."

"One time I went into a restroom and a girl followed me in. I signed an autograph for her in the sink. It was pretty funny because she was in a guy's restroom and she wasn't embarrassed at all."

Explore more quotes by Mae West

"A man in the house is worth two in the street."

"Personally, I like two types of men - domestic and foreign."

"I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it."

"I like a man who's good, but not too good - for the good die young, and I hate a dead one."

"Any time you got nothing to do - and lots of time to do it - come on up."

"Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you."

"If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning."

"I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing."

"I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action."

"A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction."