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"The British do not expect happiness. I had the impression, all the time that I lived there, that they do not want to be happy; they want to be right."
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"Eternity is a mere moment, just long enough for a joke."

"The value of time is immeasurable."

"Sometimes I feel like if you just watch things, just sit still and let the world exist in front of you - sometimes I swear that just for a second time freezes and the world pauses in its tilt. Just for a second. And if you somehow found a way to live in that second, then you would live forever."

"Worrying about what happened on Monday, or, what might happen on Wednesday, is at the expense of one's Tuesday."

"Don't equate effective living to being busy."

"People wish to learn to swim and at the same time to keep one foot on the ground."

"Time passes..and a billion lives are affected in ways we'll never know."
Explore more quotes by Quentin Crisp

"There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn't get any worse."

"Vice is its own reward. It is virtue which, if it is to be marketed with consumer appeal, must carry Green Shield stamps."

"The British do not expect happiness. I had the impression, all the time that I lived there, that they do not want to be happy; they want to be right."

"I recommend limiting one's involvement in other people's lives to a pleasantly scant minimum."

"The poverty from which I have suffered could be diagnosed as "Soho" poverty. It comes from having the airs and graces of a genius and no talent."

"It is explained that all relationships require a little give and take. This is untrue. Any partnership demands that we give and give and give and at the last, as we flop into our graves exhausted, we are told that we didn't give enough."

"Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh."

"I simply haven't the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds."
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