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"It's official, Arnold said he will enter the race for governor. At least that's what everybody thinks he said."
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"I'm glad that it didn't take as long to get Shepard off the ground as it's taken this series. I'd begun to think the Congo would be ahead of us in the space race before Whispering Smith ever got on the air."

"Race relations never improve in war time; they always worsen. And it is when the boys come home the Ku Klux Klans are organized. I believe with George Schuyler that the only really feasible way to improve the general situation of the American Negro is to convince more and more whites that he is, as men go in this world, a decent fellow, and that amicable living with him is not only possible but desirable. Every threat of mass political pressure, every appeal to political mountebanks, only alarms the white brother, and so postpones the day of reasonable justice."

"I think he had a wake-up call. It's a different kind of race, and I think maybe he didn't take it quite as seriously as he might have, but you can bet he learned a lot of lessons."
Race,

"Everyone has said very supportive things coming out of D.C. today. We can't wait when the race has begun."

"Believe me, you lose more than a gallon of fluids during a race. You could lose between six and 10 pounds during a race, depending on hot it is."
Race,
Explore more quotes by David Letterman

"We make a lot of fun at President Clinton's expense. But this transition is going to be tough because it's been 25 years since this guy has gotten laid in the private sector."

"Congratulations are in order for Woody Allen - he and Soon Yi have a brand new baby daughter. It's all part of Woody's plan to grow his own wives."

"Last night the United States dropped four 2,000 pound bombs on Saddam Hussein. I don't know anything about explosives, but, my God, do those things even need to explode?"

"Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees."

"I know these jokes aren't great, ladies and gentlemen, see this is the problem you run into when you're between impeachments."

"President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage war, and I'm thinking, well, hell, he didn't need the approval of the American voters to become president, either."

"Experts say that Iraq may have nuclear weapons. That's bad news - they may have a nuclear bomb. Now the good news is that they have to drop it with a camel."
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