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Phyllis Diller

"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"

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"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"

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Asa Don Brown

"Another cause of change, one less noticeable but fundamental, is the modern growth of population closely connected with scientific and medical discoveries. It is interesting that the United Nations has set up a special Commission to study this question."

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Asa Don Brown

"When I went to the University, the medical school was the only place where one could hope to find the means to study life, its nature, its origins, and its ills."

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"Medical liability reform is not a Republican or Democrat issue or even a doctor versus lawyer issue. It is a patient issue."

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Asa Don Brown

"There's a lot of interest from the medical community on how things develop in microgravity, and the hope, later, that is expected to apply to what the changes are in humans as well."

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Asa Don Brown

"The logic is often far-fetched - how does medical marijuana affect interstate commerce? - and some conservatives would like judges to start throwing out federal laws wholesale on commerce clause grounds. The court once again said no thanks."

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Asa Don Brown

"In our own state, we came up with, I think, what was a very novel approach to closing the gap on the uninsured. To harmonize medical records - which was a major step in getting costs out of the system."

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Asa Don Brown

"If we don't change, millions of American families are just one medical emergency, or one layoff, away from financial disaster and bankruptcy."

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Asa Don Brown

"The great medical facilities are a relief for the parents, too, who don't have to think about caring for their young ones on their own for a weekend. They have a great time."

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Asa Don Brown

"'Early stages' is when the cancer is completely contained within the prostate. If it is detected when the cancer is entirely in the gland, the chance for full recovery is at its highest."

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Asa Don Brown

"We need to bridge the gap between the medical libraries and the hospital rooms; take the information out there already, add to it, focus it, harness it - and bring it to the patient who was just diagnosed today."

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Phyllis Diller
"My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor."
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Phyllis Diller
"My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual."
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Phyllis Diller
"We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up."
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Phyllis Diller
"It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core."
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Phyllis Diller
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
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Phyllis Diller
"I'm eighteen years behind in my ironing."
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Phyllis Diller
"Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight."
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Phyllis Diller
"The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing."
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Phyllis Diller
"My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me."
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Phyllis Diller
"You know you're old if your walker has an airbag."
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