"My bullshit metre is reading that as false'."

Humor, Truth, Judgment, Reality

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"My bullshit metre is reading that as false'."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Don't interrupt me while I'm interrupting."

Winston Churchill, English Statesman

Humor, Communication, Life, Patience

"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Procrastination, Delay, Action

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

Margaret Atwood, Canadian Novelist

Humor, Escape, Solitude, Space, Privacy

"Kemp: I demonstrated conclusively this morning that invisibility--I.M: Never mind what YOU'VE DEMONSTRATED!--I'm starving, said the voice, and the night is--chilly for a man without clothes."

H. G. Wells, English Author

Humor, Observation, Survival, Humanity

"I hope you're not smoking in front of her,' Lucia says to him.'Yeah, I lie in bed and puff in her face, Lucia,' he says, irritated."

Melina Marchetta, Australian Author

Humor, Observation, Life, Interaction

"Niagara ... is the first disappointment in the married life of many Americans who spend their honeymoon there."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist

Humor, Disappointment, Marriage, Travel, America

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

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"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

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"Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don't forget food. You can go a week without laughing."

Joss Whedon, American Writer

Humor, Survival, Life, Joy

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

Richelle E. Goodrich, American Poet

Humor, Love, Happiness, Today, Truth

Explore more quotes by Charlaine Harris

"I suffered with you. I hurt with you. I bled with you - not only because we're bonded, but because the love I have for you.' ~ Eric Northman in Dead in The Family."

Loyalty

"We could go back to your house. I can stay with you always. We can know each others bodies in every way, night after night. I could love you. I could work, you would not be poor. I would help you."

Love

"The ache became longing, longing became nostalgia, nostalgia became fondness, and after a while he could see the funny side of it. A long while."

Nostalgia

"Eric moved the broom experimentally and made an attempt to sweep the glass into the pan while it lay in the middle of the floor. Of course, the pan slid away. Eric scowled.I'd finally found something Eric did poorly."

Memory

"I didn't see what was in front of me until I thought it might be taken away. - Sam"

Memory

"Pam. Listen.'The phone is pressed to my ear. Speak.'Appius Livius Ocella just dropped in.'Fuck a zombie!' - Sookie & Pam, Dead in the Family, Charlaine Harris"

Supernatural

"Life had sure been simpler when I hadn't dated."

Integrity

"Vampires. They wrote the book on possessive."

Fantasy

"As I climbed up into the high old bed, the large fly in my personal ointment did the same. Had I actually told him he could get in bed with me? Well, I decided, as I wriggled down under the soft old sheets and the blanket and the comforter, if Eric had designs on me, I was just too tired to care.'Woman?'Hmmm?'What's your name?'Sookie. Sookie Stackhouse.'Thank you, Sookie.'Welcome, Eric."

Romance

"No threatening the cat!' Mr. Snuggly said."

Humor