"The key to good eavesdropping is not getting caught."

Humor, Secrets, Observation, Attention, Privacy

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"The key to good eavesdropping is not getting caught."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Don't panic. Are you sitting? You probably don't need to sit. Well, possibly. At least lean on something."

Maggie Stiefvater, American Author

Humor, Calm, Reassurance, Fear

"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."

John Green, American Author

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" Think of how many times you put on your underwear in a lifetime. It was appalling, it was disgusting, it was stupid."

Charles Bukowski, American Author

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"Silverfish looked down."Oh. Are you a dwarf?"Cuddy gave him a blank stare."Are you a giant?" He said."Me? Of course not!"Ah. Then I must be a dwarf, yes."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Identity, Giants, Truth

"What's a philosopher?' said Brutha.Someone who's bright enough to find a job with no heavy lifting,' said a voice in his head."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Truth, Happiness, Power, Today

"At this, Gansey rolled over onto his back and folded his hands on his chest. He wore a salmon polo shirt, which, in Blue's opinion, was far more hellish than anything they'd discussed to this point."

Maggie Stiefvater, American Author

Humor, Appearance, Opinion, Judgment

"Reason like a sphere? What type of reasoning does a wooden sphere do?""The circular type, I should think. And, by coincidence, it is my favorite type as well. Perhaps that's why I'm so good at the game."

Brandon Sanderson, American Author

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"Lovemaking is a big grammatical error, i think it should be, LustMaking."

Michael Bassey Johnson, Nigerian Philosopher

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"If there was an elephant in the supermarket, she'd either not see it at all, or call it Mrs Jones and talk about fishcakes."

Jeanette Winterson, British Novelist

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"I liked that he was a tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointments in the Department of Having a Voice that Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin."

John Green, American Author

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Explore more quotes by Lemony Snicket

"The sky was dark blue twilight, pretty to look at but lonely to walk under."

Poetry

"There's nothing wrong with athletics, but they shouldn't get in the way of your schoolwork."

Education

"I like a story that could never happen to me. If I want real life I'll read a newspaper."

Creativity

"A new experience can be extremely pleasurable, or extremely irritating, or somewhere in between, and you never know until you try it out."

Life

"It is easy to decide on what is wrong to wear to a party, such as deep-sea diving equipment or a pair of large pillows, but deciding what is right is much trickier."

Humor

"A good library will never be too neat, or too dusty, because somebody will always be in it, taking books off the shelves and staying up late reading them."

Education

"Count Olaf sounds like an awful person. I hope he is torn apart by wild animals someday. Wouldn't that be satisfying?"

Humor

"We don't need a destination or a way of navigating, because we'll go wherever it takes us."

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"How did you do that? Mr. Poe asked. "Nice girls shouldn't know how to do such things."My sister is a nice girl, Klaus said, "and she knows how to do all sorts of things."

Family

"The world is quiet here."

Peace