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Earl Wilson

"A woman may race to get a man a gift but it always ends in a tie."

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"A woman may race to get a man a gift but it always ends in a tie."

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Earl Wilson
"He was so honest you could play craps with him over the phone."
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Earl Wilson
"This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in love as they are in debt."
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Earl Wilson
"Nonchalance is the ability to remain down to earth when everything else is up in the air."
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Earl Wilson
"Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits till the rest of the family brings the car back."
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Earl Wilson
"One way to get high blood pressure is to go mountain climbing over molehills."
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Earl Wilson
"Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death."
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Earl Wilson
"A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been taking."
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Earl Wilson
"To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible."
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Earl Wilson
"Today's accent may be on youth, but the stress is still on the parents."
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Earl Wilson
"Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't."

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"No men are oftener wrong than those that can least bear to be so."

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"Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them."

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"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."

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"Many men are contemptuous of riches; few can give them away."

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"Genius: the superhuman in man."

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"Men exist for the sake of one another."

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"One man's ways may be as good as another's, but we all like our own best."

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"I will praise any man that will praise me."

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"When men come to like a sea-life, they are not fit to live on land."

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"A man should be upright, not be kept upright."

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