"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"

Driving, Today

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"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"

Exlpore more Driving quotes

"Along with you, I have witnessed the unfortunate rise in gasoline prices that has accompanied the summer driving season and the more recent spike in prices due to Hurricane Katrina."

Bob Ney, American Politician

Driving, Summer

"Mind your driving."

L. M. Heroux, American Author

Driving, Mind

"My driving force is spirituality."

Debra Wilson, American Comedian

Driving, Force, Spirituality

"It seems that whatever we do is somehow beyond reproach - murder, rape, drunk driving - as long as we go on a TV show and apologize."

Eric Stoltz, American Actor

Driving, Murder

"I wasn't the kind of person that liked waiting for autographs or following them, I just liked to go to the shows, study their records, driving many, many hours to different states to go to concerts."

Lenny Kravitz, American Musician

Driving, states, Study, Waiting

"Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash."

Dave Barry, American Journalist

Driving, Humor, Exaggeration, Chaos

"You've got to be closer to the edge than ever to win. That means sometimes you go over the edge, and I don't mean driving, either."

Dale Earnhardt, American Celebrity

Driving,

"I mean, I guess I realized subconsciously that this is what I should be doing before I realized it, consciously. Verbally, I don't think I had committed to it, even though I was driving everywhere, every night, just trying to get on stage."

Todd Barry, American Comedian

Driving, Night, Trying

"Composing is like driving down a foggy road toward a house. Slowly you see more details of the house-the color of the slates and bricks, the shape of the windows. The notes are the bricks and the mortar of the house."

Benjamin Britten, English Composer

Driving, Road, Windows

"I think that anybody's craft is fascinating. A taxi driver talking about taxi driving is going to be very, very interesting."

James Lipton, American Educator

Driving, Talking

Explore more quotes by Tommy Cooper

"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"

Car

"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."

Drink

"A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'"

Age

"I went window shopping today! I bought four windows."

Windows

"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"

Blind

"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'"

Building

"Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!"

Marriage

"I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'"

Kitchen

"I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure."

Now

"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."

Night