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"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"
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"I wasn't the kind of person that liked waiting for autographs or following them, I just liked to go to the shows, study their records, driving many, many hours to different states to go to concerts."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I wasn't driving down the wrong side of the street, smoking marijuana, waving my gun out the window."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Composing is like driving down a foggy road toward a house. Slowly you see more details of the house-the color of the slates and bricks, the shape of the windows. The notes are the bricks and the mortar of the house."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It allows you to say things that sound very dramatic and get away with it. If you had characters in modern fiction say the same things as they're driving down the street in an Oldsmobile they'd sound ludicrous!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"I always think about what I missed, and I think that was my driving force - never be satisfied with what I've done."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Driving is a spectacular form of amnesia. Everything is to be discovered, everything to be obliterated."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I found my first novel difficult. I don't want to make it sound like it's any more difficult than driving a cab or going to any other job, but there are so many opportunities for self-doubt, that you just kind of need to soldier on."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Mind your driving."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"I quit driving, I'm not retired."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'"
Age
"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'"
Building
"So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"
Thought
"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."
Night
"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"
Car
"I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure."
Now
"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"
Driving
"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"
Blind
"I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'"
Kitchen
"I went window shopping today! I bought four windows."
Windows
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