"When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway."

Family, Mother, Advice, Want

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"When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway."

Exlpore more Family quotes

"I confess that in 1901 I said to my brother Orville that man would not fly for fifty years."

Wilbur Wright, American Inventor

Family, Brother, Man, Years

"As much as I transferred my mother to Elizabeth Shore of The Black Dahlia, as much as her dad mutated into an obsession with crime in general, well, I have thought about other things throughout the years."

James Ellroy, American Writer

Family, Dad, Mother, Thought, Crime

"Perhaps because my relationship with my father went through such a long, bumpy time, it's been very important for me to work to try to keep lines of communication open between my sons and myself to try to avoid my father's mistakes. At least if you're making mistakes, make different mistakes."

Salman Rushdie, Indian Novelist

Family, Parenting, Communication, Love

"A daughter is a rainbow - a curve of light through scattered mist that lifts the spirit with her prismatic presence. Is a shadow - a reminder of something brilliant ducking out of sight, too easily drawn away. She is an aria, swelling within the concern chamber, an echo reverberating across a miniature sea. She is a secret, whispered, a hint of what we cannot know until it finds us. She is a sliver of her father, a shard of her mother. A daughter is a promise, kept."

Ellen Hopkins, American Novelist

Family, Daughter, Love, Promise

"But, as my mother used to tell me, two wrongs don't make a right. But I soon figured out that three left turns do."

Jim Hightower, American Activist

Family, Mother, Right, Wrongs

"There's nothing that makes you more insane than family. Or more happy. Or more exasperated. Or more . . . secure."

Jim Butcher, American Author

Family, Emotion, Security, Happiness

"That great Cathedral space which was childhood."

Virginia Woolf, British Author

Family, Childhood, Space

"Here is the real domino theory - gay man to gay man, bisexual man to straight woman, addict mother to newborn baby, they all fall down and someday it will come to you."

Anna Quindlen, American Journalist

Family, Mother, Baby, Gay, Man

"Happy or unhappy, families are all mysterious. We have only to imagine how differently we would be described - and will be, after our deaths - by each of the family members who believe they know us."

Gloria Steinem, American Activist

Family, Will

"Mrs. Binnie says we throw out more with a spoon than the men can be bringing in with a shovel...Binnie-like. Our men like the good living. And what if we don't be having too much money, Patsy dear? Sure and we do have lashings of things no money could be buying. There'll be enough squeezed out for Cuddles when the time comes. The Good Man Above will be seeing to that."

L. M. Montgomery, Canadian Author

Family, Gratitude, Poverty, Faith

Explore more quotes by Erma Bombeck

"Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it."

People

"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery."

Car

"Never have more children than you have car windows."

Car

"For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward."

Time

"When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911."

Nothing

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Exlpore more Family quotes

"I confess that in 1901 I said to my brother Orville that man would not fly for fifty years."

"As much as I transferred my mother to Elizabeth Shore of The Black Dahlia, as much as her dad mutated into an obsession with crime in general, well, I have thought about other things throughout the years."

"Perhaps because my relationship with my father went through such a long, bumpy time, it's been very important for me to work to try to keep lines of communication open between my sons and myself to try to avoid my father's mistakes. At least if you're making mistakes, make different mistakes."

"But, as my mother used to tell me, two wrongs don't make a right. But I soon figured out that three left turns do."

"There's nothing that makes you more insane than family. Or more happy. Or more exasperated. Or more . . . secure."

"That great Cathedral space which was childhood."

"Here is the real domino theory - gay man to gay man, bisexual man to straight woman, addict mother to newborn baby, they all fall down and someday it will come to you."

"Happy or unhappy, families are all mysterious. We have only to imagine how differently we would be described - and will be, after our deaths - by each of the family members who believe they know us."

Explore more quotes by Erma Bombeck

"When humor goes, there goes civilization."

"Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely."

"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."

"How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?"

"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest."

"Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it."

"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery."

"Never have more children than you have car windows."

"For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward."

"When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911."