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"My routines come out of total unhappiness. My audiences are my group therapy."
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"I know two kinds of audiences only - one coughing, and one not coughing."

"Phish and Dave Matthews really know their audiences and really treat them well."

"Audiences like their blues singers to be miserable."

"Large audiences did not suit my low-key approach."
Explore more quotes by Joan Rivers

"I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again."

"Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise."

"I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, 'Get the hell off my property.'"
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