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Dave Barry

"The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number."

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"The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number."

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Amber Hurdle

"I learned to play guitar at a young age and converted poems and stuff that I had written to songs."

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Amber Hurdle

"Old age and the passage of time teach all things."

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Amber Hurdle

"I think we ought to raise the age at which juveniles can have a gun."

Age,
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Amber Hurdle

"Old age is not a limitation or that your time have expired. Retirement is not that you are tired.You have more experience."

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Amber Hurdle

"In this age, which believes that there is a short cut to everything, the greatest lesson to be learned is that the most difficult way is, in the long run, the easiest."

Age,
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Amber Hurdle

"There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age."

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Amber Hurdle

"It doesn't matter how old you are.It does matter how much you care."

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Amber Hurdle

"Every age has a keyhole to which its eye is pasted."

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Amber Hurdle

"At 50, everyone has the face he deserves."

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Amber Hurdle

"Error is acceptable as long as we are young; but one must not drag it along into old age."

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Dave Barry
"Maybe somebody finally shot the dog."
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Dave Barry
"We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail."
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Dave Barry
"Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash."
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Dave Barry
"I love the Olympics, because they enable people from all over the world to come together and--regardless of their political or cultural differences--accuse each other of cheating."
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Dave Barry
"Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night."
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Dave Barry
"The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl."
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Dave Barry
"The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby's grandparents. You feel completely comfortable entrusting your baby to them for long periods, which is why most grandparents flee to Florida."
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Dave Barry
"Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects."
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Dave Barry
"It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This is why it takes several million sperm cells... to locate a female egg, despite the fact that the egg is, relative to them, the size of Wisconsin."
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Dave Barry
"I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care."
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