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"My dad was an Arsenal supporter and he used to take me there, but I've always been Chelsea."
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"To he who avenges a father, nothing is impossible."

"I used to annoy my father by telling him how much I felt luck was with me."

"More and more couples are having this negotiation or discussion, but I'm still amazed at the number who aren't and where the cultural norm sort of kicks in and they just assume that mom's got to be the one who stays home, not dad."

"It now costs more to amuse a child than it once did to educate his father."
Explore more quotes by Eric Bristow

"Trouble is, I don't get to play a lot at the moment because I've just signed a contract where I've got to do 200 shows a year in pubs, so the golf's fallen away a bit."

"I remember when we were in the World Cup in Australia and I had to win the singles against Tony Payne, best of seven legs, to win it. I was 2-0 down but ended up beating him 4-2."

"It took me about 10 years to get rid of. I'm all right now, though, lovely, I'm throwing some nice darts at the moment, but every now and then I get a bit of a jump. I wish I could find a cure, I'd make a bloody fortune."

"I've got a nice little crafty deal with the people in Barbados; 10 days out there teaching the locals how to play darts for an hour a day. Get paid for that as well."

"The Crafty Cockney had a picture of the owner dressed up as a copper, so I brought it home, wore it on TV and the name just stuck."

"All this cuddling and kissing on stage these days, well it's all right in football when someone scores a goal, but not when you're playing darts."
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