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"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...'"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Stealing, you'll go far in life. Actually, there is something funny about getting away with it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My little dog, he did not get ill. It is so funny that people get ill on a boat and dogs do not."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it's fantastic and it makes me very happy. I'm dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I remember nearly having a fit of the giggles during the reading because dear Daniel was SO respectful and serious and I was finding the whole situation funny because I was speaking to his profile."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Movies either work or they don't work and they're either funny or they're not and we work very hard. To achieve that kind of work is really kind of delicate stitching."
Author Name
Personal Development
"One time I went into a restroom and a girl followed me in. I signed an autograph for her in the sink. It was pretty funny because she was in a guy's restroom and she wasn't embarrassed at all."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"I like reading Ball Tongue lyrics and all that stuff. And they published a book, and I wouldn't give my lyrics, and it's all wrong in the book, and I giggle. It's funny."
Funny
"It is quite annoying that we have to change the sound we invented just to avoid sounding like people who simply copy us, but... it is flattering and of course challenging."
Change
"When I listen to music, I don't want to hear about flowers. I like death and destruction."
Death
"The music industry can make you feel like a prostitute."
Music
"A lot of people don't realize that depression is an illness. I don't wish it on anyone, but if they would know how it feels, I swear they would think twice before they just shrug it."
People
"I'm a big rock star, I got a beautiful girl, and they still call me a fag. Its' like high school never ends - the jocks are always on top."
School
"At first I was queasy; I'll never forget the sound of the scalpel cutting a body open. But it was so cool trying to work out how these people died."
Work
"People die from typewriters falling on their heads."
People
"Sometimes I go out disguised, but people still recognize me, so I find there is no point in even trying. It would be nice to get away from it, from time to time, but the fact is, there is no place on earth where I can go unrecognized."
Time
"Real friends stab you in the front."
Friendship
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