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Artie Lange

"And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote. I got the money to do it, and I would star and all, because of being on Howard."

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"And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote. I got the money to do it, and I would star and all, because of being on Howard."

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Donna Grant

"To make dollars from cents you have to have sense."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"A drunkard would not give money to sober people. He said they would only eat it, and buy clothes and send their children to school with it."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Nothing induces me to read a novel except when I have to make money by writing about it. I detest them."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"To understand someone, find out how he spends his money."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Egoism and Money [Goddess of wealth; Lakshmi] are very much at odds [have great enmity]. There should be just enough egoism to accomplish one's work. Beyond that, any expanded egoism and money have great enmity. Money (Lakshmi) stays away from it."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Money cannot buy you love. But it sure can buy you things that some people will love you for having."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"All about the fucking money... money... money... thinking it's for the good for your generation... but so far it's neither and for that and neither and for that... It's mostly for the worst of your generation and other's generations."

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Artie Lange
"I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life."

Life

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Artie Lange
"The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent."

Talent

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Artie Lange
"Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38."

People

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Artie Lange
"And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote. I got the money to do it, and I would star and all, because of being on Howard."

Money

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Artie Lange
"When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life."

Life

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Artie Lange
"By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't plan on working that long."

Age

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Artie Lange
"The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation."

Drink

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Artie Lange
"A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian."

Christian

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Artie Lange
"It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world."

Funny

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Artie Lange
"I'm not going to lie to you fellas, I've been drinking."

Lie

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