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"I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes."
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"My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe."
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Personal Development
"I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I never believe them when they say that because you really have to sort of be aware of what's going on in the news in order to get the jokes on the show."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I guess they're tough jokes. But there's lots of things you either laugh or cry at. And you just can't cry."
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Personal Development
"You're gonna be like Aquaman? she asked. "Get the fish to fight for you?"Thanks, Percy said. "I haven't heard enough Aquaman jokes for one lifetime."
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Personal Development
"I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes. I don't know how to tell jokes."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Leo. Jason said, you're wierd. Yeah, you tell me that a lot. Leo grinned. But if you don't remember me, that means I can reuse all my old jokes. Come on!"
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Personal Development
"You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic."
Author Name
Personal Development
"In New York there isn't that weird palpable competitive thing where it's friendly but everyone isn't trying to top one another with jokes when you're just hanging around."
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"Anything that has cynicism to it and that's jaded is smutty."
Cynicism
"I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes."
Jokes
"When you're watching the news, how many days in a row can you watch that and feel good about yourself and the world?"
News
"Unfortunately, most college kids these days aren't coming from any place-they seem to ask the same kind of questions over and over again."
College
"I've become this sort of icon for the gay community. I don't like the position."
Community
"I can't tell you 100 percent what makes a relationship work. But I can see something good coming and I can see something bad coming."
Work
"Smut, if it's really smut, there's nothing backing it up. It's the easy way out."
Nothing
"I think I've drawn from some of the most feminine women, like Jackie Kennedy. I am totally devastated that she's gone. She had it all."
Woman
"When you're constantly looking for things from other people, you're not looking within yourself."
People
"When people pay to see you live, they connect with you on a much deeper level than people who just buy your records."
People
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