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"Like your sweet, affectionate house cat, Alice Dahl is easy to underestimate. It's not until the songbirds in the yard show up eviscerated on the front porch that you realize you should've kept that bell collar on her-because those poor birds never even saw her coming."
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"Our cat is kind dove shellfish, and thinks the world is hers, She finds a comfy spot and then we pet turtle sheep purrs."
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Personal Development

"Like your sweet, affectionate house cat, Alice Dahl is easy to underestimate. It's not until the songbirds in the yard show up eviscerated on the front porch that you realize you should've kept that bell collar on her-because those poor birds never even saw her coming."
Author Name
Personal Development

"A cat can make you feel well rested when you're tired or turn a rage into a calm just by sitting on your lap. His very nearness is a healing song."
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"Don't worry, little bunny, we only use our triplet telepathic powers for good."
Fantasy

"Turns out rolling your eyes in a bar when 'Land Down Under' plays is like someone belching during the Star Spangled Banner in America."
Sensitivity

"I'm almost afraid to tell you. Let's put it this way: clean toilets are the least of your problems in this country."
Observation

"So, while we're sitting here on this luxury yacht enjoying our bread and water, why doesn't someone tell me the plan?"
Lifestyle

"Would you like to hear about the fascinating things lizards can do if you chew off their tails?"
Nature

"How was I supposed to know 'lucked out' means 'I got screwed over' in Australian?"
Humor

"I believe the phrase you're looking for is 'too much money and not enough things to spend it on."
Humor

"Mouse likes to drag you to uninhabited areas with no cell signal-all those places perfect for dying of exposure."
Survival

"Don't be such a dumbass, Gabe. Koalas don't travel in herds. They move in heaps. Much like emus move in ripples, and kangaroos travel in photo-ops."
Humor

"Well, the gondola operator-whose name was 'Happy,' I might add-failed to inform me that about sixty seconds into the trip, the floor under the section of car I was standing on was going to slide away.Turns out it was a really useful way of finding out which of the passengers suffers from acute acrophobia."
Fear
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